purity ,

another journey of diving deep into the roots of who i am ,

what could be ,

what i have lost ,

running away from temptations ,

pushing through myself to remain disciplined ,

i find myself craving for all the things that i needed healing from ,

i find myself missing your touch as you were the only person that got me ,

i find myself forgetting about why i started this but yet again i am human ,

i paid attention to the cracks of my heart ,

i paid close attention to the loneliness that came with everything i had lost ,

i lost a lover ,

i lost friends ,

i lost parts of myself that made me feel

whole ,

seen ,

happy ,

cherished ,

and balanced ,

but yet again ,

life just does not stop for us to be and feel whole again ,

it just continues ,

i fought with myself countless times just so i could see the good within myself ,

loneliness became my friend ,

while everything made sense to everyone ,

i still craved for the intimacy but i knew it came at a price ,

the price of completely drifting away within myself ,

how i wish things were never like this ,

but here we are now…