barely alive ,

i wonder ,

i sit by myself and wonder ,

a lot of time has passed ,

i think about the future ,

i worry so much about myself ,

it scares me how i do not see myself past 30 ,

i wonder ,

it saddens me how i feel alone in a room full of people ,

it worries me how the voices in my head make me feel inadequate ,

a lot of time has past ,

i cannot stop thinking of my worth ,

and how maybe i am not worthy to be alive ,

i am barely alive ,

i am tired ,

i am drained ,

i am drowning ,

i do not need words of wisdom ,

or saving ,

turning to Christ to make the pain go away ,

it has worsen on a daily ,

i am barely alive ,

i want to live , and not just survive ,

my heart is hurting ,

but i choose to remain positive...